OLD YELLER PART I- SAVING CUCUMBER SEEDS IS EASY!

It was just so sad. He was laying under a withered cucumber vine there in the garden, up against the fence; motionless, unaware. Unnoticed until too late he had lingered there and now, expired, he was of no further use to anyone. Yes, Old Yeller, once a proud and tasty cucumber had died on the vine, as it were.

What to do with the dear departed? Interment in the compost pile? A vikings funeral? Keep him by the shed door to hurl, end over end like an old fashioned German potato masher grenade to make a satisfying and somewhat squashy impact on Mr. Bears' nose when next he stops by to grace us with a table dance we definitely have no use for or desire to witness?

None of the above. For as it turns out, Old Yeller and others of his ilk have more value to us as a potential cucumber patch in years to come than do cool, crunchy green specimens no matter how tasty they may be. We are going to extract and save Old Yellers' seeds.

The first step is to allow several cucumbers to hold their ground there by the fence, to grow and gradually decay like an old Studebaker on a backwoods road,

THE OBJECT OF OUR SOMEWHAT LABORED STUDEBAKER SIMILE.

When they have yellowed naturally but are still firm it is time to gather them up, rinse and dry them off, and then place them in a room temperature environment inside the house to decompose until they are soft but not quite mushy. Keep the cucumbers out of direct light while this process continues.

We will update this post with pictures and directions as we proceed through the remaining steps that will lead to a supply of viable seeds, good for several years and which can be sown, sold, swapped or simply given as gifts.

As a bit of a hint, the next step will require an old crock. (Or plastic pail, large glass jar or the like.)

What's that Agnes? No, not you, this kind of old crock, is what we meant.*

That's about it for today folks, check back at Uncle Mac's Garden Shed for real time directions for saving and storing your own seed supply. It is simpler and more rewarding than you might think.


*HAD YOUR ASSISTANCE BEEN REQUIRED, AGNES, THE MOT JUSTE WOULD HAVE BEEN "BATTLEAXE"


Oh and of course, yellowed or not you can still eat them. One rather tasty way to do so is revealed right HERE!

Time for 'taters!

"Aunt" Agnes

'Taters! Got new pertaters!

THE PRODUCE IN QUESTION

Got some 'taters and some Brandywine termaters!
Gonna scrub them 'taters, toss 'em in a pot!
Berl 'em t'il they's ...AWWWKK! WHAT? Umph mrglrmff mrgrlub mfunug....

*Sounds of a smallish, elderly and highly intoxicated woman being removed, kicking and mrglubling from the premises by a very large man in a leather mask.*

[Editors intervention: Our apologies, ladies and gentlemen for yet another unwarranted outburst by Agnes. Yes, indeed, we pulled a few new potatoes and plucked a couple of tomatoes. No need for a Broadway spectacular on the subject.]

Keep watching for the next Farm Girl's Corner when she discusses kale as a fall crop in what I am certain will be excruciating detail. Carry on! 

Garage and rummage sales yield unusual gardening tools

Hi its Aunt Agnes agin' stoppin' by with some quick info!

Ya know, nobody ever uses "Uncle Mac" and "genious" in the same sentence but the man occasionally demonstrates a low form of animal cunning. The sort you see in salmon fer instance, when somehow they return unerringly to their home rivers when its spawnin' time, or in the humble woodchuck who never fails to find the right hole. I understand that the latter skill set is actually beyond Uncle Mac when he's in his cups but of course that's just hear say.

But what...

[ Editors note: Just making the observation that a man who can manipulate space-time without making fatal errors cannot be a complete idiot! ]

[ Farm Girl's rebuttal to the editor's unwarranted intrusion into Aggy's post: "Wanna bet?" ]   

Erm? Are ya'll done buttin' in?

Anyway I wanted to tell you about the unusual but useful and CHEAP tools Mac brought home from the rummage sale t'other day.

Oh I know whatcher thinkin'! Its a blender and a Granny mirror! What in the wide world of sports are we gonna do with those?

Well, first of all, we are gonna put dryed egg shells in the blender and reduce them to powder, along with just a wee bit of epsom salt. This, if we are unimaginative makes a nice side dressing for plants that we wish to dress, sideways.

But, if we chuck in room temperature water we can make a nice calcium magnesium shake to pour right on the mulch covering our plants roots! 

Of course we have to shake the hell out of the container to make sure the calcium does not precipatate to the bottom, y'all know how intractable calcium can be.

And then Uncle Mac makes us all pina coladas in that blender! They are crunchy and taste like a dose of salts but hey, there's an s-load of rum and what might actually be coconut in there, lets not offend the old buzzard.

"Did you clean this blender before you mixed drinks?", Farm Girl asked one time.

"Course I did."  said the antique lyin' sack of organic fertilzer.

That leaves the Granny mirror. 

What's on yourn squash? Squash bugs!

Where do they lay eggs? Under the leaves.

How do y'all find these nasty bastids? Y'all look under the leaves.

What is the easiest way on both the gardener and the plant to do so? With a mirror.

Well there y'all have it, Uncle Mac blunders into something useful, make of it what ya will.

This is Aunt Aggy, Have a festive 4th of July and thanks for readin'!

SOMETHING HOT FROM THE PLOT!

HowwwwwwDEEEEEE! It's me! Aunt Agnes and Ah am as happy as a boar hawg in a pen fulla brood sows! We went out into the garden that Uncle Mac's Shed is the shed therefore, if you catch my drift, and WE all have a  SURPRISE for YEW! Woooo Hoooo! Can all Y'all guess what it is? Ah'll give yew a hint, its what's fer dinner! 

It's turnips!

Yummy turnips!

Yew can boil' em,

You can broil 'em,

'cause they's turnips!

Turn 'em into turnip-slaw,

Steam 'em in a pot!

Skewer 'em for shish - ka - bob,

Yew can eat 'em cold or hot!

They's turnips, yummy turnips!

They's hunnerts in the plot!








Shoot Ah'm so gosh dern excited Ah might just do a fandango right here and now! Here Ah go!

[ Uncle Mac's editorial note: There followed a mercifully brief interval wherein Agnes, a butt in one hand and a Lone Star in the other, a turnip clenched between her, uh, tooth broke into a kind of manic buck and wing. We had recorded this, but destroyed the only copy. There are some things one simply does not do to the readers.]   

Whew! Well now, gotta ketch ma breath...Ain't quite as young as I useta be...

WHO SAID "NEITHER ARE THE PYRAMIDS?"

Well anyway folks that's the latest gardening triumph here at the shed. Looks like peas and cabbage are right around the bend, we'll keep yew posted!